Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Year One

Approximately one year ago (give or take 3 weeks) I began this blog. I didn't know what the hell I was doing, I just knew that my friend Stefanie Wilder-Taylor said I should. We had just met, I thought 'she's funny as hell and seems to have it together as a mom, I'll do whatever she says'. I know, that's ridiculous. In my defense I was sleep deprived, and she's pretty.

You: Dude, you are such a name dropper.
Me: I know. Sorry.

But I'm glad I did. And so I've been up here more or less consistently typing into the void of the interweb sharing my panic about this parenting thing, and my love of the tiny boy with the big head, the endless nights of sleepwalking, our shortfilm fundraising efforts which succeeded (woot!), a possible huge move out of the state (which isn't happening by the way), and the continual unfolding of realization that this choice we made to be parents just changes the whole playing field in ways I still don't fully understand.

The shockwaves run the gamut: finances, career, friendships, marriage, personal identity. For me it's been a bit extreme in such groundshaking, earthquaking ways that it looks like a crack the size of South Dakota and feels like the crushing loneliness I felt driving through that state when I was 20. I feel a little ridiculous by how thrown I am by this new life, and while it's definitely getting easier, glimmers of the existential angst remains.

But I'm here, and you know what?  It's getting better and better. It's actually turning out to be an incredibly sweet life, and the likelihood is that the darkness I've seen this year is what brought me into this light. Sure the PPD fairy left her mark, but her fairydust doesn't choke me anymore, thankfully that little beyatch is flitting about more on the periphery.

So now that I've linked my way through some highlights of the year, I'll also share some faves that are unrelated. If you've got a minute or 14, wade on through...

Cute hubs on our anniversary
*A big creepy fight outside our house
* A lovely moment of happiness during the holidays
* Sad (long) story of my brother's journey with schizophrenia
* During the movie review phase - Away We Go
* The birth story that I wrote in SWT's class. This was Take 2.

I'll leave you with this. One of the only ways cute hubs and I made it through the year is through knowing Larry and Linda - The Untroubled Couple. They are amazing and have a beautiful way navigating the stormy waters of love. Please watch the trailer for their webseries and become a follower. You won't regret it.

Untroubled and pretty happy about it,

PS - Link count: -  14 of my past posts and 2 other sites. That's a lotta linky!

PPS - Can't leave you without one pic of the BHB. This is his sign for Light.


  1. I wish I had read this last night. Well, for my own selfish reasons (i.e. I enjoy reading your bidness) I hope there's another year of bloggy goodness in you.

  2. Happy blogiversary, babe! What a fantastic journey it has been. Thank you for sharing your year on LCD. I hope you keep on going with the blog. xx

  3. He is just gorgeous and you're so SO lucky to know Stefanie Wilder Taylor. I totally want to meet her....and I want to have a play date so my kids can play with her kids.

  4. Hey, I'm honored to be your bloggy AND real life friend. I'm proud of you for starting, maintaining and rocking this space. You are my good and sweet and talented friend and you'd better continue on because you have a ton to say that's brewing in that pretty little head of yours.

  5. Happy blogaversary! Has it really only been one year? Amazing.

    You exude such light, such love. I'm grateful to be able to visit your acre of the internet - I always come away fulfilled in some way.

    And, yeah. Stef rocks.

    That picture of your son just melted my heart, too.

    I'm so glad you're here.